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Funny Jokes > Lawyer jokes - Random

01/05/2010 04:30 AM
Corruption
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't hear the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated.  read more »
12/12/2009 03:10 AM
Blind Justice
A young boy asked is father, "Dad, do lawyers ever tell the truth?"

The father thought for a moment, "Yes son, sometimes a lawyer will do anything to win a case!"
03/31/2008 07:59 PM
The Priest, Policeman & Lawyer

The miser knew he was dying and he wanted to take his $30,000 life savings with him when he passes away.

He summoned his 3 friends to his bedside. He knew he could trust them, but not completely as to entrust the entire sum to any one of them. So he split the savings amongst the 3 of them, $10,000 each, with instructions that they should put the money into his coffin when he was being buried. The 3 men, a priest, a policeman, and a lawyer, solemly agreed to do so.

The miser, was then relieved, he knew that they would do as he bidded, or at least one of them would, and he would have his money even when he has died.

Soon he passed away.

After the miser was buried, the 3 men stood together and looked at the ground.
The priest said, "I have a confession to make, you know the $10,000, I think it is a waste to put all that money into the coffin, so I took $1,000 and put the rest into the coffin."

The policeman said shamefully, "I too thought the same way, but I took $5,000 and put the rest into the coffin."

The lawyer declared, "I am ashamed of the two of you."  read more »


06/30/2009 06:01 AM
Billing
A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.

Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice.

After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"

"I give it to them," replied the lawy  read more »
02/26/2010 08:49 PM
New Lawyer
Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to the small town because he could be a big man in this small town. He really wanted to impress everyone. He opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first. One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk.  read more »